The times are changing - I see it more and more in the wedding industry that parents are not paying for the full wedding. It is usually the couple now that is spending their money to pay for the majority of the wedding and reception. Also, a lot of couple are now cohabiting before the wedding - so there is shift from couples starting out with nothing when they get married to couples getting married who already have a house or all the homely appliances they need. So where does that leave the wedding registry? Sure you can ask for that set of dishes you have had your eye on or those plushy towels you would normally never buy yourself. But most couples are asking me for advice on how to ask for the gift of money. Here are a few ways that we have found:
1. Have a cute note/poem included with your Invitation
- we got something similar to this in an invitation from cousins and we thought it was a nice way to do it - giving someone an out though is a nice thing to do about saying that their presence is all that matters to you.
2. The Newlywed Fund from the Knot
- There are quite a few websites where you can sign up and have people give you a monetary gift via the internet. I really liked the newlywed fund because it doesn't charge you, the couple, a fee. You can also set it up with experiences on your honeymoon - so if you want to do horseback riding on the beach you can add the amount it costs and people can gift you money towards experiences.
3. In the registry section of your wedding website, add that poem in there from above.
4. Have your bridal party and family spread the word to the other guests.
5. Don't be vague when you ask for money - be specific on what you are using it for. People like to feel more connected to your cause.
It is more common now to ask for money - so don't feel ashamed. Weddings are expensive and especially if you are paying for it yourself -these gifts can really help soften the blow. Obviously don't say you are using the gifts to pay for the wedding - use it for your honeymoon or home improvement jobs or something like that!
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